ABC Story

This is an assignment that I had to do in class. We had to start every sentence with the ABC's. We also had to have a run on sentence of at least 100 words. This story doesn't make sense but I love it still!! Enjoy!

A bell tower chimed in the distance. Billy was running to get to class on time. College is hard! Dropping his books on his desk, he noticed that there was a long list on the white board at the front of the room that he was supposed to do but forgot because he had a date with a hot blond girl the night before with his roommate who had a new girlfriend and they didn’t want to go out alone so they forced Billy to go with them to a club where he met the hot blond that he went out with which is why he didn’t do the long list of things to do that was on the board in his class. English was not going to happen today. Finding himself back in his apartment, Billy looked around. Ginger, his pet Beta fish swam circles in its bowl. Hats, helmets, hoddies and headphones were strewed all over the couch. “I can’t take this anymore!” Jumping at the opportunity, Billy started packing his bags. Keeping his stuff together, Billy loaded his car. Lastly, Ginger was put into the front seat.  Moving out was the best choice he ever made. Neatness was a necessity for Billy. Opening his computer at the coffee shop to start looking for a new place to live he noticed that he could have a place all to himself. Personal space would not be violated. Quietness would always be an option.  Rest would not be interrupted. Standing up, Billy went to the address on the computer. The place was perfect. Upon moving in Billy purchased everything that he would need to live comfortably. Vacuuming his bedroom floor a, Billy knew that he made the correct choice. What were his old roommates thinking now? X-acto knife at the ready, he opened his first box and started to unpack. Years later Billy got a new roommate. Zelda was neat, clean, quiet, and now married to Billy.

Henry and Sarah

So this is something that I wrote a long, long time ago... you can definitely see how I have improved as a writer. But this is a small section from a book that I wrote. Yes, it is LDS based. This story is Sarah, who is not really religious, goes to BYU, a very LDS school, and meets a guy who is LDS. This is their cute meet. This story is very close to my heart. So I hope you like it and want more of Sarah and Henry! Please feel free to comment and share with others.

As Sarah boarded the plane to take her from Tampa, Florida to Salt Lake, Utah she dropped her purse and everything inside of it went flying everywhere. As she scurried to pick everything up she felt a hand on her elbow, pulling her up. As she stood to her full height of 5’8” she bent her head up to look into piercing blue eyes. The stranger smiled at her then picked up all of her belongings. Sarah watched as she silently cursed herself for being the person who has to carry something for everything.

           Those blue eyes looked into her brown ones as the stranger handed Sarah her items.

           “Thanks.” Sarah took her stuff and shoved it into her purse and hurried to her seat.

           Once she was situated, she sat back to wait. Sarah was moving to Provo, Utah to go to Brigham Young University. She was nervous for several reasons. One, she was not a Mormon. Everyone else in Provo is, she had looked it up when she first decided to go to BYU. Sarah felt like she was going to be an outsider. Two, she was not going to have any friends, mostly because she is not Mormon. Mormons like to stick together and not talk to outsiders. Three, this is her first year of college. Sarah is 21 years old and grew up in a small town near Tampa. She had never left home and has been saving since she was in high school to get enough money for college. Sarah wants to go to BYU because they have a really good art program that she liked.

           Back in Tampa, Sarah worked at Pop’s, a family hangout. Pop’s was the place that Sarah’s parent came to after school while they were growing up. It was the place where Sarah’s dad took her mom on their first date when they were 13 years old. Pops was good to Sarah, he gave her a job while in high school and afterwards. She would spend her breaks downstairs in the basement, working on her projects. Pops would let her paint down there when she wasn’t working.

           While she was on one of her breaks, Sarah was working on a portrait for her dad. I was almost complete. She was going to give it to him for his birthday. Sarah knew that he would love it; it was a portrait of her mother.

           Sarah’s mom was killed in a car accident and taken away from Sarah when she was 12 years old. Brian, Sarah’s dad, didn’t handle it very well. He had to go through a lot to realize that he could not loose Sarah as well. She was a part of the women he loved since high school. So he got the help he needed. Sarah went through losing her mom, watching her dad self destruct and other trials by herself, but she had her paintings.

           As Sarah looked into the eyes of her painted mother, tears welled up in her eyes. Her dad and she were close now. He knew how much Sarah wanted to get into BYU and into the art program. It was Brian who had delivered the news when the acceptance letter came.

           Sarah smiled at the memory and opened her eyes. It was then that she realized that the blue eyed stranger was sitting next to her reading a book.

           “Good memory?” He asked quietly.

           “Yes, very.” Sarah replied shyly. She shut her eyes again to try and return to the memory. After a while in the air, blue eyes asked her something. At first Sarah didn’t realize he was talking to her, no one ever talked to her. She turned to look at him and realized that she missed a lot while he picked up the contents of her purse. He sat taller than her by a good head. He had dark skin and hair as black as night. The only imperfection about him was a scar that went from the tip of his ear to the corner of his eye. It wasn’t a straight scar like from surgery, but more of a scar from an injury. Even that looked amazing on him. Sarah had to take a deep breath before responding.

           “Sorry, what did you say?” Blues eyes smiled and repeated his question.

           “Where are you headed?” He waited patiently, for her to respond, while looking into her eyes.

           “Provo, Utah, to go to school.” Sarah responded shyly.

           “Oh!” He seemed to brighten up. “Are you going to BYU? What are you going to study?” Again he looked her in the eyes and waited patiently for her response.

           “Yeah, art.” He stared at her for a couple of seconds then asked.

           “Do you believe in God?” Sarah rolled her eyes at the questions and responded,

           “You’re a Mormon, huh?”

           “Why yes I am! You have heard of us!” Sarah rolled her eyes again. Then laid her head back and pretended she was going to sleep. She got what she wanted, to be left alone. As she was left alone, she began to feel guilty. So she picked up her head and turned toward Blue Eyes.

           “I’m sorry, that was rude.” She paused a moment, “I believe that God is someone who brings hard things into people’s lives for no reason, just to punish them.” As she said that Blue Eye’s blue eyes got really big.

           “No!”  He said it like he just found out that Santa was not real. Sarah looked at him in surprise. “What? God loves you!” He said it with such conviction that Sarah got chills down her arms.

           “And how do you know that?” Sarah asked as she rubbed up and down her arms. Blue Eyes passed her his jacket, thinking she was cold. She took it and put it around herself. She saw how big it was and looked at Blue Eyes again. Sarah noticed how his arms filled out his short sleeve shirt.

           “I know that because I have felt His love in my life. He has given me everything.” He started to dig around in his bag.

           “All He has given me is pain. He has taken everything from me.” Sarah said as she folded her arms. Blue Eyes stopped and looked up at her. She said that with such conviction that it was Blue Eye’s turn to get chills down his arms. He stared at her a moment longer than he continued to dig around in his bag. When he came up again he was holding a blue book. He then asked a simple question.

           “Do you want to be happy?” Sarah wanted that more than anything, even more than going to BYU.

           “Yes.” She breathed, barely above a whisper.

           “Read this!” He said, matching her volume of voice. Sarah’s hand was shaking as she reached out and took the book. As she took it she felt warmth spread throughout her arm and throughout her whole body.

Shot Gun

This is a story that I wrote for one of my classes. I edited it but this is more along the line of the original. I liked this story better. Lol Just remember that my weakness is knowing which tense to use.... so yeah. This story was inspired mostly because of the gun. I want this gun! It is beautiful! But enjoy and comment on what you like or don't like about my story. 

Thanks all!!

Paige Edwards was not looking forward to her trip to Miami Florida. She had to stay at the Trump International Beach Resort. Gross. It was too high class. Sure Paige loves her Coach Swagger 20 in pebble leather purse in red ($350) and her Coach Swagger wallet in pebble leather in matching red. ($250). She loves her iPhone 6s, iPad and Mac Air computer. Her designer pencil dresses and skirts are something that she can’t live without. The pearls that she wears on a regular basis don’t even come close to her diamond earrings that she wears to formal affairs. She loves and can’t live without any of these things, but staying at the Trump International Beach Resort was a little much. But that is where Johnathan wanted to meet, of course. She hasn’t seen him since high school and he calls her out of the blue. He is so manipulative. She would have to pay for everything, that’s why he chose this hotel. He wanted to score a dinner out of her one last time.

            “Kim, I don’t want to go on this trip. He is going to ask for money.” Paige paused, listening. “I know, I won’t give him any. I don’t owe him anything.” Another pause. “I don’t know what I will be doing. I think I’ll bring my shot gun and go shooting.” Paige laughed into her phone. “Alright, I have gotta pack. I’ll call you later. Bye Kim.” Paige laughed one more time and hung up the phone.

            The trip from her New York penthouse to the curb of the dreaded hotel was not pleasant. The flight was delayed, her luggage was lost, and her taxi drove like a mad man on drugs. Getting to the hotel was just another step towards something else that was going to go wrong. She handed the taxi driver money as a bellboy from the hotel rushed out to greet her and retrieved her luggage. This bellboy had on a uniform that was too small for him. His long arms that lifted her suitcase out of the trunk of the taxi looked as if they would break with so much weight. As he pulled out a shot gun case he stopped. He admired the case and looked up at Paige.

            “What….?” He asked reverently cradling the case in his arms.

            “It a Remington 870.” Paige said. He fingered the lock on the case. She took a step forward to give Bellboy a piece of her mind for messing with her most prized possession but stopped as she watched him softly place it on the bell cart. She turned away and started digging in her purse as he finished loading her luggage. She pulled out her matching wallet and headed towards the doors motioning for Bellboy to follow her. As she approached the check in desk she felt as if someone was watching her. She pulled up her sunglasses and placed them on top of her head, holding back her red auburn hair. Her green eyes searched for the brown ones of Johnathan’s that she knew were watching her.

            She saw him leaning against the concierge desk talking on the phone, or at least appearing to be talking on the phone. Paige took note of his appearance he stood out like a sore thumb. She noticed the blue shirt with a pen smear near the pocket, like his ball point pen had exploded in the pocket. He was wearing a navy blazer over the top of his shirt, undoubtedly trying to cover the stain and class up his look. His black slacks looked as if they hadn’t ever seen a washing machine. His greasy hair was slicked back off of his face, all but one strand that fell in front of his eyes.

            Paige walked towards the front desk, keeping Greasy hair in her peripheral vision. She checked in and had her bags sent up to her room. Paige headed towards the bar when she noticed that Greasy hair was gone. He was no longer standing next to the concierge desk. She looked around, trying to find him again. When she entered the bar something else caught her eye that made her forget Greasy hair all together. It was an announcement of her, when she was a freshman in college. But wait, this girl had a freckle on her face that Paige did not.

            Room 675 was at the end of the hall. Paige didn’t remember walking here from the bar after seeing the picture. She was so dazed to see the announcement. It was advertising a wedding, this girl to a man named Henry Williams. Paige hadn’t seen her since she gave birth to her in the hospital. Could this be why Johnathan wanted to meet all of a sudden? Is the wedding why he chose this specific hotel? Did he have contact with their daughter?

            Paige walked into the restaurant of the hotel. “Do you have a reservation?” asked the snarky man at the hostess desk. “Edwards, party of two.” Snarky looked up her name and led her to a table that was outside on the porch. The sun was just setting at the shoreline turning everything purple, pink and orange. The marble tables were all set for two, such a romantic setting. Paige rolled her eyes as she sat down at the table Snarky motioned towards.

            “You had to get this table, didn’t you?” sarcasm was thick in her voice.

            “You know it babe!” A man in a cheap suit commented with a tooth pick in his mouth. “Only the best for my love bug.” He smiled showing teeth that had not been brushed that day. Paige rolled her eye again and took her napkin and placed it over her legs.

            “I haven’t been your love bug in 19 years.” She picked up her cup to take a sip of water, holding her back from saying anything she might regret later. How did she ever stand dating him in high school?

            “Look, babe, I’ve been thinking about us and I think we should get back together. I mean, what do ya say?” He indicated with is hands towards the two of them. Paige leaned back in her chair, holding her water and looked at Johnathan. His hair was wet but brushed and parted on one side, which was a plus, at least he showered. His cheap suit hung loosely on his frame, while she noticed that his tie was crocked. It was part way unzipped, giving it away. She rolled her eyes once again and leaned forward, taking his tie into her hands and zipping it up all the way.

            “No.” she pulled the tie a little too tight. Johnathan’s throat contracted and a small grunt slipped out.

            “Okay, fine. Have it your way. Let’s just have a pleasant meal and catch up with each other.” Through the rest of the meal they made small talk. They talked about work, where they were living and the big things that have happened in their lives in the 19 years that have passed.

When the bill came Johnathan sat back in his chair and looked at Paige. Relunctly Paige pulled out her wallet and paid the bill. They continued to sit there in silence. The sound of the ocean beating against the rocks and dinner chatter from other guest was all around them. Paige could tell that he had not dropped the bomb that he had planned to disrupt her life. She knew it was coming any moment. Johnathan leaned forward, setting his drink down and narrowed his brown eyes. Here it comes. “Our daughter is getting married this weekend,” pause, “in this very hotel.” He waited for a reaction that never came. Paige took a drink of her water and stared at him with emotionless eyes, she didn’t say a word. She took another drink of water and looked at Johnathan. Johnathan’s eyes narrowed even further. Irritation showed on his face.

Not wanting to make a scene, Paige picked up her hand purse, “I know.” She stood up, letting her napkin that was sitting on her lap fall to the floor. She looked down at it, debating picking it up. “Good bye Johnathan.” She turned to leave, picking up the napkin, setting it on the table. Johnathan watched her walk away ever so gracefully.

After Paige left Johnathan walked to the beach where there were white beach chairs set up for the guests. He took one that was out of the way of the other guests and sat, sinking into the white sand. He staring at the navy blue sky, stars scattered across it. The lantern nearby was the only form of light, casting an orange glow. Leaning back Johnathan saw a shadow more. Becoming more aware he sat up, a greasy hair man took a step out of the dark and into the circle of the orange glow. Heart beat quickening and blood pressure pulsing, Johnathan tried to look at ease. He leaned back in his beach chair and smiled. “What are you doing here?” Ignoring the question Greasy hair responded, “I saw your girl check in this afternoon.” He smiled, a tooth was missing from his bottom row. Johnathan sat up quickly, sand flying as he sprang to his feet. “Don’t even think about it!” He yelled quietly. He ran his hands through his hair, messing up the neatly combed part. “We are not here for her.” Greasy hair’s eyes narrowed as his smile grew bigger. “Okay, but we gotta go. We’ve got a job to do.”

A phone went off, Paige’s hand couldn’t find the receiver, she was half asleep. Finally, finding the receiver she sits up. “Hello?” She says groggily into the phone. “Good morning Ms. Edwards, this is your 8 am wake up call.” Taking a moment to get oriented Paige looked around. “Okay, thank you.” She paused, rubbing her eyes. “Will you make a schedule for me? Massage, the spa, I need a medi/ pedi. Oh, and a good place to eat lunch.”

“Yes Ma’am. A schedule is on the way up with your breakfast.”

“Thank you.” She hung up the phone and looked around her room one more time. Her suite cases sat on the ottoman that sat at the foot of her bed. Her clothes were ironed and nicely hung in the closet. Her favorite purple blanket laid folded at the foot of her bed. It matched the floral print of the bed spread. Her shot gun was put away in the closet behind her designer clothes. Sitting on the dresser was her jewelry and purse. The matching mirror sat atop the dresser. The sun shone through the light, white curtains that hung loosely open, the light breeze through the open doors blew them slightly. Paige rubbed her eyes and walked to the bathroom.

The double sink counter was full with her makeup and hair supplies. Johnathan hated how much space she took up, but this beauty didn’t happen on its own. She sighed at that thought of Johnathan. She hadn’t meant to be rude but she has not had contact with their daughter since she held her when she was first born. As she pulled out her tooth brush her mind wandered to that day.

“Paige, I need you to push. You have to push.” Paige grinned down and pushed with all her might. Then a lot of things happened all at once. The monitors beeped rapidly, nurses were yelling and running about, her doctor gave directions, the room was in ordered chaos. Paige didn’t know what was happening, the room was spinning, the pain was unbearable, then all went black.

“Paige, honey, I’m so glad that you are okay!” Her mother was who she focused on hours later. Her throat hurt so bad, like cotton was shoved down it. “Water.” She asked her mother. A cup was placed in her hands as her bed was moved into a slightly sitting up position. After a few sips of water, Paige noticed that her mother, father and doctor were all in the room with her. But someone else was missing. “Where is she?” Tears started streaming down her face.

“She’s fine honey! Her parents are with her. She is a beautiful baby girl.” Her mother pulled some hair out of her face. Paige smiled and looked at the doctor. “How are you feeling?” Paige smiled and nodded, close to totally losing it if she said one word. “When you pushed you tore your uterus wall and started bleeding. We had to do a c- section.” Paige could feel the pain, but she wanted something and the pain was a distraction. “Can I hold her before…?” Her voice trailed off once more. Her father responded with a harsh tone. “We will have to ask her parents but I’m sure you can.” These were the first words her father has said to her since she came home and announced that she was pregnant. The doctor left and a few minutes of silence passed until he returned with the baby girl. He placed her in Paige’s arms and left them alone.

A knock pulled Paige back to the present. Fully dressed and ready to start the day she opened the door. Standing before her was Bellboy, but he was not dressed as a bellboy today.

“Good morning Ms. Edwards, here is your breakfast and schedule for the day.” He pushed the food cart into the room and stood straight, pulling the vest of his uniform down. This uniform fit his slim frame perfectly. He looked like a different man. His arms still looked like they would break if the cart was any heavier but he looked more at home in this uniform. Paige remembered when he pulled out her Remington so reverently and a smile formed on her face.

“Thank you. Mr.” She paused waiting expletively.

“Mr. Wright.” He bowed as he said this. “Is there anything else I can get for you this morning?”

“Will you go shooting with me sometime today?” She spoke before she could think about what she was saying. Her eyes got all big and her face flushed. All confidence she had in herself flew out the open window. Mr. Wright looked at her with eyes that she couldn’t read.

“I would love to but I don’t think that would be appropriate.” He bowed again.

“Well, then I will just have to speak to your boss.” She was just going for it now. What else could she loose? A smile formed on his face, showing white pearly teeth. His gazed looked around the room, coveting the shot gun and just dying to use it.

“That will be unnecessary. I would love to go shooting with you this afternoon. Is 12:30 okay with you?”

“Perfect, I’ll meet you in the lobby.” She turned to head back to her bedroom. “Wait, will you pick up more shells? Just put them on my bill. And anything else you might need.” He nodded, bowed and walked out of the room without another word.

It was 12:20 when Paige walked into the lobby, she sat at the beautiful black vintage couch. Her jeans were nicely pressed and hugged her frame in all the right places. The sheer purple blouse showed her white tank top tucked into her jeans. Mr. Wright stood at the front desk next to his boss and found her sitting there. She was reading a book so she took this opportunity to get a better look at her when she wasn’t watching. Her auburn red hair was brushed neatly into a ponytail that hung to the middle of her back. Her bangs fell into her eyes as she looked down at the book that she was reading. Her freshly manicured hands tenderly turned the pages. Mr. Wright imagined holding those delicate hands in his own. His eyes followed the rest of her down to her feet where the Remington sat at her feet in its bright pink case. He felt a nudge at his side and turned to find his boss smiling up at him.

“You know I shouldn’t allow you to do this. It’s against employee regulations. But she is leaving tomorrow so where is the harm?” Mr. Wright stood a little taller, smiled and walked towards Ms. Edwards. She looked up and saw him walking towards her. His uniform vest was replaced with slacks and a red polo shirt tucked into them. He carried a brown paper bag in his hand as he approached her.

“Ms. Edwards, are you ready?” She nodded, not trusting her voice. She placed her book into her purse as he bent over to pick up the shot gun case. He motioned towards the door and smiled. As they were walking towards the front door Paige felt eyes watching her again. She felt annoyed that Johnathan had not left her alone after last night. She turned to find him. She was stopped in her tracks to find Greasy hair looking at her. She had not thought about him since she saw him yesterday afternoon. Her heart beat increased as she become more nervous and his eyes bore into hers.  Not seeming to notice her mood change Mr. Wright put his hand on the small of her back and led her outside. They left the hotel and stepped into the bright beaming sun, the sun a brilliant contrast to the mood Paige was now feeling. She tried to shake off the feelings and just enjoy herself. She was out with a handsome man. She didn’t need to worry about Greasy hair.

 The weather in Florida in October was perfect. Sitting at the curb waiting for them was an olive green 1996 Ford F-150. It was a few feel higher up than the average pick up. There were dents all along the side of the bed. Mud covered the tires and the side of the truck. Opening the front passenger door for her he waited. “How do you expect me to get in this? I need a ladder.” He smirked at her as he pulled out a step stool for her. She rolled her eyes and stepped into the truck taking her seat in the torn bench seat. Mr. Wright ran around the front and jumped gracefully into the front seat. He started the truck, giving a loud roar which drew attention to them from other guests at the hotel. He laughed at her as he pulled forward and she jumped to hold onto the door.

“Mr. Wright, drive safely. I have a wedding I’m going to tonight.” Her knuckles turned white as they gripped the door. She tighten her seat belt, making sure it was securely in place.

“Please, call me Brad. And I will get you to that wedding.” He shot past a stop sign and turned right. Paige and Brad bumped up and down all the way to the outskirts of town. Shooting outside of town, outside in the country is legal. The truck ride was too loud to talk much. As they pulled into the wooded outskirts, Brad climbed out of his truck. He ran around his truck to see Paige sitting on the edge of her seat looking down at the earthy dirt, contemplating jumping and spraining an ankle. Brad took her arm and helped her down.

“Thank you,” Paige responded shyly. Brad smiled and pulled out her pink shot gun case, a book bag and the bag of ammo. He started up the trail first, Paige following behind him slightly, struggling to keep up. After 10 minutes of hiking Paige’s sides were burning from lack of oxygen.

“Please…” Paige wined, Brad turned to see her hunched over, grabbing her side.

“Sorry, we can take a break. We are almost there.” He pulled a water bottle out of his book bag and handed it to her. She stumbled to a rock and sat down, slushing water down her front. This was not what she was picturing when she asked him to go shooting, make-up was smearing for goodness sake. She tried to redeem herself.

“Thank you for the water.” She stood up. “I think I’m good to go now, if we are almost there.” He replaced the bottle after taking a swig of it himself.

“We can go a little slower.” He started off once more, just as fast. The silence between them was driving Paige mad. He had to say something, but he didn’t.

“Three hours with that guy. I thought that he would at least take the time and get to know me. Get to know what I am doing in Florida. I would have loved to get to know him as well. He may be skinny as a stick but a very cute stick.” She paused, listening as Kim spoke on the other end of the phone. The elevator door dinged as she listened and she took a step inside. The ride to the 6^th floor seemed to take forever as her friend lectured her once more about how she doesn’t ever “put herself out there.” Paige rolled her eyes, thankful that her friend couldn’t see her. As she was approaching the door to her room she heard yelling. It was coming from her room. She hung up her phone without saying good bye. She set her purse and shot gun on the floor. Digging in her purse for her key she listened to the yelling.

“I told you not to come here.” She heard Johnathan’s voice on the other side of the door.

“I don’t care. This is such a good haul. I don’t care about your stupid girl. She’s left you hangin so many times in high school. When are you going to get over this?” This was another voice that she had never heard.

“That is not what this is about. I just….” The other voice cut Johnathan off.

“Well, guess what.” He paused, you could hear the evil smile on his face. “Brad is distracting her so that she is not here. Taking her on the worst date.” He laughed. Paige found her key and pulled out her shot gun. If someone was in her room they were going to be surprised. No one messes with her.

Walking quietly to the door of her room the yelling gets louder. She puts the key in the door and open it slowly. Just as the door unlocks a gunshot goes off. As Paige’s ears rang she banged the door open and shot at the first thing that moved. As her adrenaline calmed she looked around her. On the couch of her room was Greasy hair. He was shot in the chest from her shot gun. His eyes open. His greasy hair staining the arm that his head rested upon. Turning towards to door to her bedroom and bathroom she found Johnathan, lying in a pool of his own blood. 

The Woman

I like to write. I don't write for others, I write for myself. I know I am not perfect in my writing skills, I'm still improving them but I hope you enjoy and if you want you can give me some feedback. I like constructive criticism.This is a short story that I wrote for one of my classes in college. We were told that we need to do research on a career for this story. So I chose firefighters. I know, I know... all fire fighters are hot! Don't worry this one is too!I hope you enjoy it. 

The Woman

I felt the alarm before I heard it. I vaulted out of my bed in a room that I shared with 4 other men. Everyone else was already running towards the door. I wasn’t far behind them but this was my first call and I was praying I remembered all my training. After months of fake drills and tons of training I was finally assigned to the firehouse in Logan. Here we go…. I’m nervous.

Ninety seconds later I had my 60 pounds of gear on and was the last one on the fire engine. As I put on the headphones I heard the dispatcher giving instructions to the engineer.

            “House fire, female in her mid-20s reported a neighboring house.” I heard all of this through the headphones as we were pulling out of the garage.

            “Rescue 70 in route. ETA approxamently 3 minutes.” 3 minutes…. I had 3 minutes… I can do this. I have worked hard to be here. I can do this. 2 minutes… I broke the training record. I can do anything. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. 1 minute…. I opened my eyes to see the house in the distance. The flames reached above the roof of the house. The flames were licking the sides of the houses that were built too close to each other. I never want to live somewhere where I can see into my neighbor’s bathroom.

            The engine stopped and everyone was moving all at once. Moved right alongside them, my training coming back to me without me having to really think about it. I unbuckled my belt and followed my comrades outside. The heat from the flames felt like I had walked into an oven. I was handed a hose and we ran towards the oven like flames.

            “Mac, we’ve gotta get this hose to the side of the house. We need to protect the houses on both sides.” Smith was yelling something that I already knew. I was right behind him with the hose. In a matter of seconds water was being mixed with the flames. I was burning up in my suit but the water that splashed against my cheeks kept me moving towards the house.

            As I moved towards the house I saw something in the basement. A shadow moved across the window. The bottom of the basement window lined up perfectly with the ground. A black folding chair came flying out the window. It landed in the soggy grass near inches from where I was standing with the hose. Glass scattered the ground. Smoke came billowing out of the window.  I knew I needed to act as chairs don’t come flying out of windows on their own. Smoke inhalation is the cause of about 50% of deaths involved with fires. Someone is in the house. I disregarded all of the training that I had spent months learning. I knew the consequences of running into a burning building without a plan and approval from the captain. The disciplinary action that the captain could take would end my career as a firefighter before it even started. But it didn’t matter, there was someone in there, throat burning and smoke choking. I have to do this.

            “Smith, take over.” Smith was behind me, helping control the hose. He came forward as I walked methodically towards the now broken window. Black smoke was billowing out of the windows. As I approached, I heard Captain yelling my name. The protocol ringing in my ears.  But I kept moving forward, time seemed to slow down to an almost stop. I have to get to whoever is in the basement. The sweat was rolling in rivers down my neck and back as I finally approached the now broken window.

            I leaned in close and saw someone laying on the floor. I turned to see Smith and Captain running at me, yelling my name. But I looked back at the person laying on the basement floor, covered in a blanket and I didn’t even have to think. At least the blanket will protect her. I ran to the side of the house, adjusting my face mask to fit snuggly against my mouth and face. My oxygen tank didn’t bounce as I took each step. I knew that my equipment is where it should be, I learned that my first day at training.

            I approach the back door, there seems to be no immediate danger. I lifted my booted foot and kick at the door, it snapped in half, creating a whole big enough for me to enter. I adjusted my yellow helmet and again surveyed my surroundings for danger. The fire seemed to be contained solely on the other side of the house.

            I lifted my foot and took my first step into my first burning house. The vision of a person lying on the basement floor motivated me to keep moving forward. The flames are loud, even from the other side of the house. I again heard my name being yelled. I turned to see Smith in the doorway behind me. He nodded his head and followed me the rest of the way into the house. The nod, he was there to help me and do what was needed to help me save this woman. We were going into the house blindly and without a plan. I knew that Smith doesn’t do anything without making a mental pro and con list, but he followed me none the less.

            There was a crashing sound from somewhere as my hand landed on the railing that headed downstairs. It hadn’t taken me long to find the basement in the house. It was the first thing I saw after I turned away from Smith’s nod of backing. It was right in the entry way from the back door. The first couple of steps creaked under my feet. There was another crashing noise, this one seemed to be closer. But I have to get to the basement, someone’s life is at stake. I saw the blanket cover the person on the floor and I moved forward some more.  

            Step, step, step. As Smith and I finally reach the bottom step I look around. I could only see outlines of the objects in the room but I didn’t notice any of it. I saw where the broken window is, and started moving towards it. My radio on my shoulder cracked and I jumped I am still not use to having that in my ears. I heard Captain’s voice on the other end.

            “Okay Mac, you can do this. Smith is there to help you. We don’t have a plan because you didn’t follow protocol. But let’s get the person and get out. We don’t need any heroes. We talked to the neighbor and she said there was only one woman living here. Let’s be safe.” Captain always ended his messages with “Let’s be safe.” I couldn’t imagine being in charge of all of us, our physical and emotional wellbeing. So I took a step towards the window and there was another crash from above, this time coming near the stairway. Smoke was building up as I walked towards the woman lying on the floor.

            I found her. She was covered with a blanket, only her hand could be seen under the blanket. I scoped her up, blanket and all just as I heard another crash coming from upstairs. I turned to Smith, his outline barely visible with all the smoke. He seemed to be gesturing towards the stairs. With the weight of the woman in my arms, I headed towards the stairs. I could hear wood cracking and popping. The way out of the house seemed to take a lot longer than coming into the house. My muscles shook not only from the extra weight but from the lack of adrenaline that seemed to be dissipating quickly out of my blood stream. As I started to head up the stairs my radio cracked again, this time I was more prepared for it. Captain’s voice was heard again,

            “Mac, Smith, did you get her?” I wasn’t able to reach my radio so Smith answered for me.

            “Ten four. We are on the stairs on our way out.” His response was quick and worried. I didn’t know what he was worried about. The fire is on the other side of the house and we were almost out. I could feel the worrying coming off Smith in waves behind me. He only worried like this for two things, one would be for his children and the second being high stress situations like we are currently in. I moved up the stairs at a quicker pace.

            “The fire has spread, it’s headed your way.” The Captain’s voice rang in our ears. Now I knew. The last few steps seemed to take an eternity to get up.

            As I exited the door with the woman in my arms, I saw all the flames. We were surrounded by them. The back door is only a few feet from us but it was surrounded with flames. The orange flames licked the side of the door and I quickly evaluated how I was going to exit the house. The temperature was rising as the fire got closer. I couldn’t smell anything due to my mask but I imagined the smell of wood burning and smoke. I looked down at the woman in my arms, blanket still covering her face and body, everything but her arm hung limp, like a dead fish dangling in my arms.  I looked towards Smith who was behind me, his face was calm and his brain was working fast. He yelled at me, “The door is right there. Go through it. The flames haven’t damaged the structure. Just go.” I went first and Smith followed. I took one step and a huge popping noise sounded. The next step I took made a cracking noise. My third step I was under the door frame, a crashing sound came from behind me as I was thrust forward out of the house. Everything went black.

            I felt the alarm before I heard it. I vaulted out of bed but hands were holding me in place. I heard Captain in my ear once again. “Everything’s fine son. Relax.” I laid back down and it was then that I realized that I was not in my bed at the fire house. Pain seared through my body. Every muscle in my body ached. I moved my toes, they were working just fine. I moved my feet, I could still feel them. I bent my knees, they worked. I did this through the rest of my body. Everything seems to be fine, except that everything hurt.

            “Brad Macdonald, do you know where you are?”

            “The hospital?” The doctor’s flash light flashed in my eyes, I blinked it away. My throat was sore, it burned.

            “I think you’ll be fine.” The doctor started writing on my chart, “Just take it slow, you have a concussion.” I sat up slowly. My heard started to spin.

            “What about the woman? Is she okay? Where is she?” I couldn’t remember what had happened after the cracking noise.

            “She is here at the hospital.” The doctor responded without looking up from my chart. He wrote a few things and then turned and walked out of the room.

            The Captain moved toward me. “She is being flight rescued to the burn unit in Salt Lake City, she was badly burned on her arm. The blanket protected the rest of her body. She will be there for a while.” I laid back down and relaxed into my pillow.

            “When can I go home?” I was anxious to get out of the hospital. The anxiety of not knowing what happened was eating me. I just wanted to get back home, or to the firehouse.

            “They want to keep you over night.” He looked over at me. “You know, you should have told me what you were planning.”

            “Cap, there was no planning. I saw her lying on the floor through the window and I had to move. I was in the house without even thinking about it.” I looked at him square in the eyes. I know I did the right thing. The Captain sighed. He nodded his head, patted me knee and turned away saying, “Well, planning is important.” I knew he was not telling me something because he wouldn’t even look at me.

            “What happened?” I whispered, my thoughts turned to Smith, he was right behind me. I saw his green eye peering at me behind his yellow helmet just as I turned to go out the door. “How is Smith doing?” I knew the answer before Captain opened his mouth. “Smith didn’t make it.” He finally turned and looked me straight in the eyes. His brown ones filled with tears which never slide down his cheek. There was a moment of silence. I saved a woman but ended up getting the best firefighter in the house killed. The thought of protocol seemed to scream at me. I killed him. It was my fault. Smith is dead. Captain cleared his throat and said, walking out the door. “Get some sleep. I want to see you in my office tomorrow.” He walked out of the room.

      “You should not have gone into that building until it was safe. We would have set a plan and taken action in a safe way.” Captain sat a little straighter in his chair. He didn’t yell at me that would have been easier to take then his soft spoken disappointment. I knew how he felt about safety and protocol. “I sent in Smith with you to help and to keep you safe. You are still a rookie and didn’t know what you were doing.” He wasn’t yelling. It was a stern voice that demanded no back talk or excuses.

      “I’m sorry sir.” I was sitting in a chair facing him. He sighed and sat forward, the leather squeaking as he did. The sound reminded me of the cracks and pops from the fire. I saw Smith’s face in my mind’s eye right before I headed towards the door frame.

            “I just want to keep you safe.” He rubbed his eyes like he hadn’t gotten any sleep the night before. “I’m giving you the rest of the week off. I expect you here for your next shift.”

            “Yes sir.” I stood up to leave. I felt guilty for running in without informing Captain about the situation, but I had no choice. And Smith was dead because of my choice. I didn’t want the woman to die if I didn’t get her out of there.

            “Has anyone told Kara?” Kara is Smith’s wife and I did not want to be the person to bring the news of their lost, although that was what I deserved after getting him killed.

            “She was told last night.” He rubbed his eyes again, “Her and the kids are over at her sister’s house in Nibley.” My stomach tightened, I thought I was going to be sick. My head started pounding as I stood to leave the Captain’s office. Every step I took towards the door reminded me of the night before, before everything went black. As I reached for the door knob Captain stopped me.

            “Mac, you did good. You saved that woman’s life.” My throat tightened, Jared and Bryce’s father will not die in vain. I am going to and see this woman, it can’t be in vain. These thoughts filled my mind as the door clicked behind me.

            “Can I see her please?” I was standing at the nurse’s station on the 3^rd floor of the University Of Utah Health Care. I drove 2 hours from Logan to see her and I wasn’t leaving until I did. I had searched the reports for 30 minutes to find out her name and what happened to her.

            “Sorry sir, only family.”

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. My head was starting to hurt again. When I opened my eyes there were small black spots in my vision. I blinked them away. I hadn’t slept at all, not with the knowledge that Smith would no longer be holding his wife and two kids. Excuse me Ma’am, I am the one that got her sent here. I would like to see her and apologize.”

I could see the look of shock on her face. It was gone as quickly as it came. “Look, I was the firefighter that pulled her out of the house, and we were both injured and I just want to see her and make sure she is okay.” A look of pity crossed her face. The guilt was boiling in my throat, threatening to throw it all up. As I looked at the nurse I could tell that I was wearing her down.

            “Please.” I tried one more time. The nurse sighed and said, “Room 347. She had grafts placed on her right arm. It will take a lot of time to heal but she will be fine. ”

      “Thank you.” I patted the counter, turned and walked away. As I followed the numbers down the hall way to Jessica Mayfair’s room I thought about the report that I read. Jessica Mayfair is in her mid-twenties. The neighbor that the Captain talked to had given more information then what was really needed. She is a preschool teacher and loves working at Woodruff Elementary School.  This brought me comfort because in order to be a preschool teacher you had to be patient….right? I thought of Smith’s death, with a preschool teacher his death won’t be in vain because she teaches the future generations.

            I was finally facing room 347. I give a knock quietly to let the occupants know that someone was going to enter. I took a deep breath and turn the knob. I didn’t know what to expect. As the door swung open I saw the woman asleep in her bed. The room was dark except for a small light from the bathroom. The air held tension. It smelled of cleanliness and sickness all at the same time. Machines were beeping and pumping as she slept. They were attached to her everywhere it seemed like. The responsibility for her condition rose in my throat and I quickly swallowed it away. I slowly and quietly walk towards the bed. There was a tray of food sitting uneaten on the counter. No one else appeared to have been in the room with her. As I looked down at her I could see how beautiful she is and couldn’t help but think how lucky her preschool students were. I sat down on the ugly brown chair that sat in the corner at the foot of the bed.  As I sat it make a squeaky noise.

            “Who are you?” I turned to see Jessica looking at me. The noise of the chair must have woken her up. I fumbled for words.

            “I’m Brad.” I stood up, feeling a little awkward. The brown chair squeaking again, “Brad Macdonald. You don’t know me.” I stopped there. I looked over at her. Her green eye seemed cloudy, like they were filled with fire, like the fires I was fighting. She looked at me with more confusion on her face.

            “I just came to see how you are doing.” She turned her head away from me. Her red hair was damp and braided along the side of her face. Her arm was heavily bandaged.

            “Who are you?” She asks again. The pain was clear on her face. I didn’t have the dignity that I had when I met with the Captain earlier. I looked down at the floor. I didn’t know how I was ever going to face her. Looking at her face I wondered if I made a mistake coming here. I didn’t prepare a speech or an apology or anything. Bail raised in my throat. I run into buildings that are on fire but I couldn’t face this one woman. I thought of Smith’s last words to me, “Just go.”

            “I am the fire fighter who pulled you from the basement and put you in this pain.” Words were just coming out without me thinking of them beforehand. “I moved as fast as I could to get to you. I saw the chair fly through the window and I didn’t even think. We have protocol and I didn’t follow it. It’s all my fault.” I finished in a low whisper. The guilt was eating me alive. I didn’t know if I could ever look at the cloudy green eyes or the red hair that reminded me of the flames the licked the door frame right before we walked through it.

            “I came here to tell you that I am sorry that you are here. That I couldn’t get to you on time. I’m sorry…” The words caught in my throat. I couldn’t go on. I had no right to ask this woman for forgiveness. I deserve this guilt and pain. The room started spinning once again and I sat back down on the ugly chair.

            There was silence for what felt like an eternity. I thought she had fallen back to sleep but when I looked up at her, her cloudy green eyes looked directly into mine. Tears filled her eyes.

            “You’re right, this is your fault.” She rolled over and pushed a button on her remote. I just sat there. I didn’t know what to do. I stood to leave. There was no more guilt, I just felt empty.

            “I’m sorry.” I walked towards the door when a nurse walked into the room. I left the door open and as I was walking away I heard her cry, “Just take it away. Make it stop.” Tears came to my eyes at that moment as I pushed the down arrow for the elevator.

            “It’s been over a month since your first fire. How does it feel?” Captain asked as he slapped me on the back. I didn’t know how to respond. I just nodded and smiled. It’s been a month since Smith passed died in my first fire. How does it feel?

            “Look Mac, it wasn’t your fault. Fires are unpredictable. It wasn’t your fault that you were blown out the door. It’s not her fault that she was in the basement. It’s no one’s fault.  These things just happen.”

            “Yeah I know.” I did know that but how do I convince myself of that? I picked up my sweater, pulling it over my head as I heard someone walk into the room that the captain and I were talking in.

            “Mac, you have a visitor.” I finished pulling the sweater over my head.

            “Who is it?” No one ever comes to see me.

            “It’s a woman!” Crane, another firefighter responded in a teasing voice. Captain smiled, patted me on the shoulder. I don’t know any woman, my whole life is work. Who is it?

            “Smith would have loved this.” Captain said with a grin on his face, “He would have been out the door and spying on this woman already.”

            I walked into the kitchen of the firehouse and could hear a woman’s voice, soft sweet, the sound of a preschool teacher. A thought perked in my mind, I once visited a preschool teacher in the hospital. I pictured the red braid and cloudy green eyes. As I rounded the corner I spotted a blanket of red hair. I paused at the door. It couldn’t be her. She hates me. She doesn’t what to ever see me again. I want to just run away. But I’m not a coward, I run into burning houses. Captain was right, Smith would be teasing me endlessly if I ran away. So for Smith I squared my shoulders and said, “Hello Jessica.” She turned around and looked at me. Her green eyes were no longer cloudy but they still held that fire. She wore a glove on her right hand and a long sleeved shirt. I could imagine the scars from her burns under them. She stood up and walked toward me.

            “I know that I’m the last person that you want to see right now but I just came to tell you how sorry I am. I should not have said what I said to you.” She paused looking down the table next to her. “I was in a lot of physical pain and I wanted to blame someone for it. You walked in and handed that to me.” She looked up at me. I could see remorse in her face. The worry lines on her forehead were pulled together, a single tear ran down her cheek. I didn’t know what to think. The knot of guilt that has been in my stomach for the past month seemed to be loosened.

“I am really sorry about the pain that I must have caused you.” I looked into her fiery eyes and smiled. Another knot of guilt that I was caring was loosen with the smile that spread across her apologetic face.